We are officially licensed!

We got our official foster license from the state yesterday in the mail.  I am feeling very positive and excited.  I feel like we are ready for anything.  All of the doors are open now and we are awaiting God's plan.  For the last 10 months or so I keep saying, any day now, it could happen any day now.  It gets exhausting waiting and hoping but I have faith that any day now (be it tomorrow or another 10 months) we will welcome another child or children into our family.  We are all as ready as we can be.  I know it's been hard for me and my husband but just imagine what it's like for a child, who was 5 when this all started and is 6 now.  A week is an eternity to a child, so imagine how long this past year has felt of waiting to be a brother.  He is such a wonderful loving boy and is going to be the best brother to whatever lucky child comes to our family.  He says now that we have our license we just have to each say 3 prayers a day and our baby will come.  He comes up with all kinds of different ideas on how to get our child to us.  I'm willing to try them all, never hurts to pray!
So, if you read this and have any faith, say 3 prayers for us.  Thanks!

Safe Delivery of Newborns

Due to recent events in the news, I must address the Safe Delivery of Newborns Law.  It is a law that has saved the lives of innocent babies and brought joy to many families waiting to adopt. Like most laws, it is not perfect.  I do believe that 72 hours is not enough of a grace period.  However, I know for a fact that it has worked and will continue to work.  I just think that there needs to be some consideration when children older than 72 hours are brought in to a safe place as well.  I'm not saying that it should be allowed for parents to drop off a child or children at any age and under any circumstance but I do think things should be looked at on a case by case basis when this does occur.

I know that if a birthmother went to an adoption agency with a toddler instead of a safe delivery location, there would be no charges brought against her for doing so.  It would be complicated and she'd have to own up to her choices instead of being allowed to be anonymous but it can be done.  Adoption plans do not necessarily have to happen during pregnancy or at the time of delivery.  It is most common for it to happen like that but adoption plans can be made at any time.  If a parent feels unfit, then they should seek help regardless.  There may be services that the agency can offer to assist the mother or father to be able to handle parenting or if adoption is the ultimate plan, they can definitely handle that.

I just don't think that these choices are talked about enough.  I know that the Safe Delivery law gets talked about in instances of babies being found in dumpsters like last week but let's talk about it regularly so that more and more people learn about it.  I know a couple of families directly affected by this law and it is a blessing!  Babies that may otherwise have no chance in life, are given an opportunity to have a loving family who wants them more than anything else in life.  So,talk about adoption and talk about the Safe Delivery law and pray that no more babies are found in dumpsters.

Thanks so much!

I haven't been back on here in a while now.  Honestly, I haven't felt like I had anything positive to say and figured it was better left alone.  Well, now I feel like venting so here goes...........

I am soooo very frustrated right now.  We started this adoption process over a year ago now and we are still waiting.  The wait was to be expected our first time around since we were in the infant adoption program.  However, this time we were told the average wait was 3-6 months for a match in the "special needs" program.  Special needs simply means thru the foster system.  Now, technically our approved home study was completed end of May or beginning of June so we haven't been approved for quite a year, but the paperwork and classes and all that business started over a year ago.   At any rate, I am growing more and more frustrated and feeling very discouraged.  I am trying to stay strong in faith and logically I know that God's plan is the only plan and I have to be patient and wait for what He has in store for our family.  It is however easier said than done. 
So, I am not sure if anyone cares or not but I am not purposely neglecting this blog.  I simply haven't had anything nice to say so figured I would just not say anything.  So, I will keep praying for the right match for our family and post again soon.

Shelley G.

The day I met my son

So, it was just over 6 years ago and my husband called me as I was leaving work.  He said he just got a call from our worker that there was a baby boy at the hospital and were we interested?  Immediate reaction of course was "YES!!!!"  Well, he was sick and they were trying to figure out what was going on with him. Still our reaction was a big fat YES!  Here's the biggest problem, we had to wait until the next day to meet him.  Talk about torture!  So, we came home and cleaned the house figuring that we had to do something to keep ourselves busy and knowing that people would be coming to visit once we brought the baby home.  We cleaned and tried to sleep and I don't believe we were very successful with the sleep part, way too much adrenaline!
We got to the hospital and went to the ICU where he was sleeping.  I can still picture the moment perfectly in my mind, I saw my baby for the first time.  From the very moment I laid eyes on him, I knew he was MY baby.  Finally, I had my baby!  He was the most beautiful baby I have ever seen and although I am biased, I swear it's an absolute fact.  I cried and I immediately had to hold him.  Ahhhh, it was the most perfect moment of my life.  We were a family and it just felt so amazing. 

Another disappointment and mixed feelings

Recently, we were matched with a sibling pair.  We never got to meet the children but their worker contacted us, interviewed us and selected us.  There was a long history to sort thru and in the end there were too many concerns for us to move forward.  This was not taken lightly and not done without guilt.  Since then I have been checking the website praying that they will be matched.  They so deserve to have a forever family and people that will love them unconditionally.  It just wasn't the right match for our family for reasons I cannot get into. 
Today, I looked and see that they have been matched.  It is a bitter/sweet feeling. I am so glad they have been matched but kind of sad because there was a time when I was picturing them as part of my family. Even though we had not met them, in my heart and mind, they were already part of my family.  It's a strange feeling.  All I can do is continue to pray and have faith in God's plan. 

Thanks for reading!

A failed match

About 7 years ago we got a call from the agency that there was a unique situation where a birthmother of a 1 and 2 year old wanted to give her children up for adoption.  She was a young mother and was struggling to give her children what she knew they deserved.  She had looked at our book and had wanted to meet my husband and I to interview us.  Of course we agreed to meet with her.
We were super nervous going into it but confident in what we had to offer.  The meeting went really well and we felt more and more at ease the more we talked.  We left there feeling really good about the situation and hoping that she would choose us to adopt her children.  Not long after, we got a call that we were chosen and set up a time to meet the children. We met them at their apartment and spent some time with them and the birthmother.  The next visit we spent time alone with the kids and eventually we got to take them to our house and for overnights.  It was all going very well.  The birthfather was not involved and his rights had been terminated but there was some concern about his parents wanting the children.  The birthmother though had been very against them having the kids and really wanted us to adopt them.  The kids would have still had a relationship with their birthmother in this open adoption situation.
It was the day of the court hearing to terminate her parental rights and the birthmom asked us to watch the kids while she went to court to sign off her rights as a parent.  I had to work that day so my husband was home with the kids.  I got a call from my husband that the agency called and said she did not go thru with it and we had to return the kids to the agency right away.  WHAT????
I can still remember the feeling of my heart breaking at that moment.  I had to make up something to leave work and get home ASAP so that I could go with my husband to take the kids back.  It was so shocking!  We walked into the agency and took the kids over to their mom and she couldn't say a word.  Of course, I don't blame her, there's nothing she could have or should have said at that point.  We were trying to keep it together for the kid's sake because they didn't understand what had been going on anyway, being only 1 & 2 years old.  It took a lot of time and a lot of tears to get thru those next days and weeks.
Eventually, these things that we have to go thru make more sense but when it's happening you don't see beyond the pain.  It's something that my husband and I will never forget and something that made us stronger together.  I still think of and pray for those kids and their mom and wish them nothing but the best.  These kids were not meant to be ours because God had a special gift coming for us, we just didn't know it yet.  Everything happens for a reason!

Thanks for reading!

Another home visit

So, today we had another home visit.  This one is for our foster license.  It went very well.  We are getting to know our social worker pretty well by now so these visits get more comfortable but are still nerve racking.  It's another one of those experiences that you don't understand unless you have been through it.  As I have said many times, this is a very invasive process and I understand that they are putting children in our care and therefore have to do what they can to ensure we are a safe home/ family.  However, it still feels very strange to have people come into our home and assess how good of parents they think we will be to a child. 
In any case, the visit went well and we are really ready to grow our family.  We have been through a lot with this process and are really anxious for another child.  More to come on the details of what all we have been through.

Thanks for reading!